DBNN – Girls Clamoring over Rihanna’s New Look

DBNN – Drunken Bastard News Network

(Los Angeles) Girls across America are going ga-ga over Rihanna’s new “Chris Brown” inspired look.

“Just look at those lips.” Exclaimed Jennifer Martin, “They’re so full they’re split; it’s hard to believe she hasn’t had collagen injections.”

What started out as assault and battery has turned into fastest rising trend in the united states . Teenage girls are begging their boyfriends to “Rihannanize them” by backhanding, bitchslapping, old school punching, or any other blunt force trauma to the face.

“I mean check out sultry swollen blackish blue eye, those come hither bruises on her cheek bones, you just can’t get that look from makeup… unless your Rick Baker that is” Jennifer concluded.

For those girls that don’t have a boyfriend, Covergirl is coming out with a new compact/ball bat combination simply called “Chris”, it’s new slogan, “Abusively Beautiful Covergirl”


  1. You are truly a drunken bastard, huh? I think that they should call the brand “Beaten Down”. It could just be the most popular line of makeup that existed!
    .-= Jim´s last blog ..Top Rap Songs | Top Ten Rap Songs (Daily Updates) =-.

  2. Both Chris Brown and Rhianna deserve to both be beaten down for staging that whole fiasco….
    Britney´s last blog post ..Conspiracy reality for boy and girls hot and bothered over Chris and Rhiana

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